SmartAssBrand

SmartAssBrand is working toward an initial product in the Lil’ Donnies series, called "Butt Ugly." We plan to offer three styles: Uptighty Whities, women's briefs and men's boxer briefs. Please register below to receive updates and to vote on future installments of the Lil’ Donnies series. Our site is secure and to the best of our knowledge has not been hacked by Russians. We will not share your data with anyone. Once we have launched prouct we will ask if you want to receive future emails - if not, we will not pester you with any further use of your registration data.   ¡ALSO, please SHARE this website with your friends!

About SmartAssBrand

¿Are you a SmartAss?   ¿Are you dismayed at the depths to which the country we love has sunk?  ¿Do you want to scream?
¡Don’t just sit there – be a SmartAss!   ¡Join us in protest – wear Butt Ugly undies every day!
SmartAssBrand is the dream-in-process of recently retired Coloradans who want to share our way of looking at and laughing with the world. Our first step was to develop the Lil’ Donnies series of protest underwear designs shown below. Our first offering in the Lil’ Donnies series will be Butt Ugly because, well, things have gotten butt ugly. We want you to help decide future installments of the Lil’ Donnies series so please register to vote.
What people are saying:  ¡Everyone tells us Butt Ugly is fantastic underwear, yuge even!
Click to register for updates from SmartAssBrand and to make your voice heard about which Lil’ Donnies design should be offered next.
WomensBriefs4Upload

Butt Ugly and Future Products in the Lil' Donnies Series

Our Lil' Donnies series includes, you guessed it, Trump-centric "portraits" - the first to go to market will be Butt Ugly, Lil' Donnie himself. Also shown below are the illustrations prepared for future offerings in our Lil' Donnies series. Take a look and have a laugh!

Butt Ugly

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: When Trump speaks or tweets it just gets uglier, plus Alec Baldwin’s Trump is hilarious!
1

Grabby Daddy

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: When Ivanka’s not out shilling her fashions or pretending to fight bullying she’s all about shilling for dear old dad
2

¿et tu, Comey?

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: so who’s more pissed at James Comey right now, the Clintons, Trump or you?!
3

veritas (in quotes)

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: Sigh, remember when gravitas was spoken in air quotes and not veritas? Maybe the Lil’ Donnies series needs a Sarah Huckabee too?
Bad Ass

Bad Ass

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: With a pair of these babies on you'll own the beach (traffic cones not included).
LoofasFalafelsOhMy

¡loofas and falafels oh my!

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: All those allegations against and settlements paid out to protect Lil' Billy O'Reilly are just liberal attacks, mind you. I mean, he had to save his family from embarrassment, right?
WOMBAT

¡WOMBAT!

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: Say, how could Giuliani possibly have known the FBI would announce re-investigation of Hillary's emails and then later deny it? And, can you guess what W-O-M-B-A-T is an acronym for?!
Persistence

Persistence

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: Who can forget how considerately Lil' Mitch extended Senatorial courtesy and decorum to Senator Warren?

More Future Products: the Violet Femmes Series

Our Violet Femmes series includes women - and one man - who we think look good in purple . . . and big, errr, little hands: we know you're the one

MallRat01

Mall Rat

  • Ok, not really a Violet Femme but had to get this one posted!
  • Inspiration: A guy in his 30's hanging at the mall to find underage dates and asking their mothers' permission: the 1970's were really weird in Alabama, huh? Extra points (and a hat pin) for taking contributions from fascists.
OverTheHillary

Over the Hillary

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: It is indeed sad Hillary's such a poor campaigner, how much better off we’d be with her as POTUS! But come on, let's focus more on what we have to get right in the future and less on what went wrong in the past, ok?
WhatMeWorry

What - Me Worry?

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: Looks like Lil' Jefferson Beauregard Sessions III may have lots to worry about, huh? And don't you just love each time he has to "amend the record" after having been so smug when giving testimony?
ICanSeeRussiaFromHere

¡I Can See Russia From Here!

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: Tell me you don't want Sassy Sarah on your ass spouting one of her classics! We were going to spell it "Roosha" but went with "Russia" out of respect for intellectual greatness.
EWW

¡EWW!

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: Man does Ann make my skin crawl - what do you bet she hero worships Ayn, another “philosopher” who basically stopped thinking critically in junior high?
PigNose20171127

Pig Nose

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: Hey, “odious” is the Georgia Supreme Court's opinion, not mine (ok, I guess I share their opinion). What a caring spirit, huh - well, what does a Christian like Nancy need with grace?
HarcourtFentonMudd

¡Harcourt Fenton Mudd!

  • Medium: silkscreen on underwear
  • Styles / Sizes: Uptighty Whities (men’s briefs), women’s briefs, men’s boxer briefs / S-M-L-XL
  • Inspiration: Ok, during the 2016 Republican party debates I laughed my ass off when Carly couldn't stop wagging her finger just like Stella Mudd (a great Star Trek episode by the way).

¡Register and Vote – it’s Patriotic!

Register and Vote

  • ¡VOTE!